The day Ne-yo sold us the greatest dream

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Singer- songwriter Ne-yo released the single “Miss Independent” in the year 2008 off his album titled: Year Of The Gentleman. The song speaks about all the characteristics he believes an independent woman possesses. He expresses how much he needs a woman like that in his life.

I’m not even going to wait to get to the conclusion to tell us why it’s impossible to date “Miss Independent”… “Miss Independent” is a friggin SPINSTER!!!!!

Think about it. Miss Independent (referred to as “she” from now onward):

  • Walks like a boss
  • Talks like a boss
  • Moves like a boss
  • Do what a boss

By this line we should both have established that she must be a boss. No not a bows. She is your employer-think The Proposal.

Let us continue. She:

  • Got her own thing and that’s why you love her right?

So this lady who is doing all this walking and talking and moving like a boss, ensuring that her manicure complements her pedicure, and has got her own thing; is now expected to have some time to spend?

Ne-yo continues to tell us that she:

  • Can do for herself
  • Does not need your help
  • Car AND crib is about to be paid off

hahahahahahaha bear with me I’m almost there….

  • Her favourite thing to say is “don’t worry I got it”- Yes like your mom
  • She must want him but not need him

Guess what the next line is????? THAT’S THE KIND OF GIRL I NEEEEEEED

So we add all these requirements up and behold! WE GET A SPINSTER.

 

DEFINITIONS

SPINSTER: The woman Ne-yo describes in Miss Independent

                     An unmarried woman, usually beyond the usual age for marriage (this definition makes me cringe because there is no “right usual age” for marriage)

                     Basically a woman who is too busy getting hers to focus on your needy ass 🙂

REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

 

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OPRAH WINFREY

FACTS:

Born January 29 1954

American media proprietor, Actress, Activist, Author, Journalist, Philanthropist, Producer, Spokeswoman and Talk Show Host

Net worth as of 5/29/2014 is $3 000 000 000 (that’s 3 billion dollars, about 30 Billion Rands)

Walks and talks and moves like a boss

The first African American woman to get listed on Forbes Billionaire List in 2003

Ranked 1st for two consecutive years in 2007 and 2008 by Forbes magazine in the list of 100 Most Powerful Celebrities

The youngest and 1st African-American female news anchor at WTVF-TV

The first lady in history to produce and own her own talk show

She received an honorary National Book Award in 1999

Oprah learned to read before the age of 3

 

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TYRA BANKS (you never thought about Ty huh? Cause the world makes you believe spinsters smell and are old and live in a house with 12 cats! The world would never tell you that spinsterhood can be for sexy supermodels too!!!)

FACTS:

SUPERMODEL

Born December 4, 1973 (yes she Is 40 years old)

Award winning talk show host, actress, media and business mogul, mentor

The first African American woman to appear on the cover of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition

Active in a number of social and charitable causes

At the age of 20, was the first black woman to be signed by a cosmetic company

Forbes Magazine’s highest paid woman in primetime in the year 2009

WALKS LIKE A BOSS

MANICURE COMPLEMENTS HER PEDICURE

Net Worth is $90 000 000 (90 million dollars; R900 000 000 :)) 

 

 

 

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 So that ladies and gentlemen, is who is being described in this song. Oprah, Tyra and many other great women, who have everything they want, who don’t need a man, who own their lives and who are independent. The “Miss Independent” men are looking for, who needs absolutely nothing from a man, does not actually need a man. It only makes sense. If I have everything I need, and my money can buy me anything I want, then what do I need a man for?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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